Drop and give me 20 chaturangas!

From the department of Yoga Isn’t for Wussies comes news that our very own US Military has adopted yoga as part of their new fitness regimen. Great! you say. Peaceful warriors! you cry. Well, kinda sorta. OK not exactly. Will the new recruits look less like Rocky Balboa wannabes and more like yoga and pilates students? Yes sir! But why’s that now? Because they’re too fat to fight! Sir!  Or so says a group of retired generals and admirals who actually put out a report this year called, you guessed it, “Too Fat To Fight”.

The NYTimes reports,

Excess weight is the leading reason the Army rejects potential recruits. And while that has been true for years, the problem has worsened as the waistlines of America’s youth have expanded.

Though the Army screens out the seriously obese and completely unfit, it is still finding that many of the recruits who reach basic training have less strength and endurance than privates past. It is the legacy of junk food and video games, compounded by a reduction in gym classes in many high schools, Army officials assert.

As a result, it is harder for recruits to reach Army fitness standards, and more are getting injured along the way.

What does this say to us? #1 We got a big ‘ol weight problem in the US. But we knew that. #2 So many people from your neighbors, to celebs, to athletes and sports heroes have taken on the practice, and yoga has become such an integral part of fitness that even THE ARMY has accepted it. Pin a medal on us and call us bedazzled!

But for the cynics out there, don’t think yoga=easy.

“It’s more whole body,” said First Lt. Tameeka Hayes, a platoon leader for a class of new privates at Fort Jackson. “No one who has done this routine says we’ve made it easier.”

Does this mean there will be less violence? Who knows! Does this mean there will be more fit and mindful folks defending freedom and human rights? We sure hope so. The physical practice is the part most easily recognized, but any yogadork will tell you, after regular practice there are many more leagues under that sea, sergeant.

BONUS: If Lt. Gen. Eric B. Schoomaker has his way, soldiers returning from combat with wounds and/or chronic pain may soon be treated with more alternative treatments to medication such as acupuncture, meditation, biofeedback and yoga . “Schoomaker’s said his goal is to form a pain-management strategy that is holistic, multidisciplinary and puts Soldiers’ quality of life first.” PTSD is also a major issue being addressed with so many related military suicides. This is big stuff. [read more at army.mil]

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Earlier…

• Specialist Kocian “Cares-A-Lot” Brings Yoga Class to Troops in Iraq
• Yoga Soldiers: India Sees Warrior Pose to Train Its Warriors

Hey hey it’s September! It’s Yoga Month! Joy! Elation! Sorry, just trying extra hard here, we know a lot of folks are going back to school, returning from vaca etc. Got to keep the spirits up!

The team at Yoga Month HQ this year are bringing the big guns, the TITANS to be exact, to ramp up awareness. Who are these TITANS of Yoga you say? Well they’re big enough to be kept in caps we hope.

DR. DEAN ORNISH,  LILIAS FOLAN,  KIM ENG,  BRYAN KEST,  ANA FORREST,  SEANE CORN,  GURMUKH KHALSA,  SHIVA REA,  DAVID LIFE,  SHARON GANNON,  GARY KRAFTSOW,  DAVID SWENSON,  VINNIE MARINO,  SARA IVANHOE,  LISA WALFORD,  LARRY PAYNE,  JOHN FRIEND,  BETH SHAW,  RAJASHREE  CHOUDHURY,  DHARMA MITTRA,  SWAMI KRIYANANDA,  DEVA PREMAL & MITEN,  SAUL DAVID RAYE , KRISHNA KAUR

Hm, they seem to be missing a few. Bikram isn’t a TITAN? Oh dear. Rajashree represent. We could continue brow beating, but this DVD is actually for a good cause and will support Yoga-Recess, an organization promoting yoga for kids in school. But, we do have to add, just like Tara Stiles and her ‘Slim,  Calm, Sexy’ garishly infomercial looking marketing campaign, they might’ve benefited from a slightly different approach here. Titans? And you could ‘Win a Personal Meeting’ one! Ok, we’re done.

In any case, we hope you’re able to take advantage of that which is Yoga Month – a whole month of yoga awareness! We hope. Is anything going on in your neck of the yoga mat?

If you’re in LA, they’re holding a schmancy premiere of the TITANS DVD tonight Sept. 1,  7.30 PST at Aero Santa Monica. You might even be lucky enough to stay for the Q&A with yoga’s Swami Kriyananda, Shiva Rea, Vinnie Marino, Sara Ivanhoe, Larry Payne and others! (Or if you pay for the $20 VIP ticket)

For the folks at home, it looks like they’ll be simultaneously screening the film online at ustream.

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Earlier…

• Jivamukti Teachers Get Naked for PETA
• Tara Stiles Launches ‘Slim, Calm, Sexy’ Yoga to Acclaim, Insult, Revolt (see marketing)
• Caption This: BKS Iyengar Blesses Bikram Choudhury in India? (photo)

Naked bums for our animal chums! NYC yoga teachers go au naturale in support of PETA.

Sadly, all we’re missing are Jivamukti founders Sharon Gannon and David Life.

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Earlier…

• Tara Stiles Launches ‘Slim, Calm, Sexy’ Yoga to Acclaim, Insult, Revolt (see marketing)
• Caption This: BKS Iyengar Blesses Bikram Choudhury in India? (photo)

Now YOU can be sexy is just 15 minutes a day! Whoa, hold the twinkies, are you talking about yoga? This is the marketing message of Tara Stiles’ new book Slim, Calm, Sexy, three little words that unlock a whole smorgasbord of emotions, connotations and a motherload of self-consciousness, maybe even worse than camel toe.

Eat, Pray, Love; Slim, Calm, Sexy; mind, body, spirit – we’re on a 3-word roll! This, friends, is the new frontier of the Incredible, Edible, Yoga: bite sized munchkins of a practice formed from the whole of the yoga donut, downsized and palatable enough for women’s magazine splash ads, and 3-minute morning show bits. Is this bad? Does it matter? Whether we like it or not Tara Stiles is the “new face of fitness” deemed so by the Queen of  ‘Workout’ of herself, Madame Jane Fonda. It’s true. (The women’s magazines are a whole other glob of dough to fry).

So Tara has seen her share of the spotlight, as a model, yoga teacher, American Apparel yoga ad-maker, Nissan yoga ad-maker, Deepak Chopra ‘Authentic Yoga’ iPhone app collaborator, and now author. She has done all of this with an impossibly thin physique! Something we assume she was born with, so we can’t really fault her on that, right? (though we can certainly look on begrudgingly).

But WHAT about the message? Responses to the hyper-pinked marketing have ranged from “We love Tara! but…” to vehement and passionately dissenting, aghast at the way yoga is whittled down to a disposable diet fad to tackle the “epidemic of bra fat!“. Stop the insanity! One commenter said it looks like something out of Cosmo, but we’re thinking it’s borderline late-night infomercial. We actually totally get the yoga every day thing. Great! Yoga to “give you the body of your dreams”? Ack. Yoga for the masses? WHO are the masses? Intention is there, but the message all wrong. Although it’s really not that far off point. See the comparison of book covers between T. Stiles and Tracy Anderson, fitness expert to the stars! (Madonna, Gwyneth, etc) below.

In a society where obsession over “no pain, no gain” fitness is routine, a yoga community that is already tossing cookies over too-sexy/naked yoga ads, and the billion dollar industry where there are moguls, large-scale mass-produced corporate sponsored events, Hollywood movie franchising and yoga “talent” representatives, would we really be surprised to find that 1-800 number on the screen at 3 in the morning badgering us to ‘act fast! feel the yoga burn with 4 easy payments of $19.99!’ ? And should we be shocked if the bandwagon of merry yogsters pisses off the hardcore home team? Something is certainly shifting, but it’s undeniable yoga is a hot commodity. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Want to know our reaction? It defaults to: what would Gabourey Sidibe have to say about this?

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Earlier…

• Fat? Yoga No Longer a Four Letter Word to Plus-Sized
• Are Yoga Ads Too Sexy? Have Your Say on Judith Lasater vs Yoga Journal, ToeSox Nudegate
• Serena Williams Embraces ‘Massive butt’, Takes it to Yoga

My, Bikram, what a bulbous shiny dome you have, perfect for ‘circus’ tricks like headstand! Let me get you a strap, for your ego, er…elbows.

It’s Tuesday, the last day of August, and this photo has us tickled with befuddlement.

This was not photoshopped!

Via facebook:

Bikram receiving a blessing from BKS Iyengar! One of our teacher training classmates, Judes
Yang, took this photo while travelling [sic] with Bikram in India when he visited Iyengar.

So there you have it. One love, y’all.

What’s YOUR caption?

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Earlier…

• Saddle Up, it’s Cowboy Yoga! (video)
• Star Wars Yoga – Now Watch the Video!
• Flavorpill Cans Sept. Yoga at Great Lawn Do-Over, Plans Mega Mass Yoga Series 2011

• Yoga ‘Don’ Bikram Choudhury Calls American Yoga ‘Fucked Up Circus’

Aaanyways, a lot has transpired over the past 14 days, so I’m going to start with the recurring theme: When hitting a wall, just as little kids do when they fall down and in that brief moment are open to let fear and panic win, and the parent swiftly smiles and says ‘you’re OK, it’s OK!’ and suddenly everything’s fine, we too should prop ourselves up, dust ourselves off and tell ourselves it’s OK, it’s OK! Be the kid, but be the parent too. And we move on, because it really is OK, and falling, fear and taking a pause are all pieces of the same puzzle. Having the flu isn’t preferred but it’s a definite focus-shifter. When concentration on a part of the whole trumps a meditative awareness of the entire package something’s gonna give.

OR maybe BKS Iyengar said it better in his book Tree of Yoga:

Suppose you are doing a head-balance. What happens if you stretch your legs in order to get a good pose and let your neck muscles become loose, or if your elbows do not grip the floor, so the fear comes that you are falling or swaying from side to side? Because the strong muscles try to control the pose, the weak muscles give way. When doing the pose, therefore, you have to maintain a single stretch from the floor to the top without letting any part drop. When you are stretching the legs, you have to send an alarm signal to your arms: “I am stretching a leg, so don’t lose your attention!’ That is awareness. (pg. 41)

Why Mr. Iyengar, funny you should say that! We were just studying inversions and backbends in training. (satya: our fab teacher actually read this passage to us before kicking off hours of bending and inverting). When practicing or teaching asana like headstand, certain parts of the body need closer attention (say the shoulders, neck, the forearms pressing down, etc.), but it’s awareness of the whole that makes it happen. It’s amazing what those heavy weights called legs can do to keep you lifted! Know what else helps? Shedding those kleshas, particularly the hairy characters of raga (attachment), asmita (ego), and the everloving abhinivesha (clinging to bodily life, otherwise known as fear of death). Scared to flip your body upside down or bend it like a twizzler? That’s OK. Pause, collect all your puzzle pieces and continue working on how they all fit together.

Just like Eminem says, “I’m not afraid to take a headstand…”

Additional highlights: Last week we watched and discussed Yoga Unveiled, which I totally recommend for all you history buffs who want to sound like you know what you’re talking about at your next yoga potluck east west debate. The yoga therapy portion is worth your while too. (it’s expensive, maybe borrow from a friend).

And now a FUN exercise for you: write a list of poses that if faced with the choice of practicing them or having your toenails pulled off one at at time you’d seriously consider the latter. Then construct a home practice around them and give it a go for a month! Sounds like a good time right? Try it!

By the way, just like anything else, I’ve gotten used to this 4-5 hour-long yogathon format and time seems to zip along now. Even the Sunday hour of pranayama and meditation is getting breezy and I could totally go longer. Watch out NY, there’s a new mobile meditater in town.

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YD yoga school updates should come pretty regularly on Sundays, at the wrap of each week. Disclosure: Training is with YogaWorks, NYC (I am not being paid to say that, Paula Lynch rocks).

Thanks to everyone who’s donated any amount. I could still really use the support. If you appreciate YD please consider a donation. Thank you!

Earlier…YD Goes to Yoga School Week 5: Restorative! Meet Me Halfway, Or Sympathy for the Dentist

• YD Goes To Yoga School Week 4: Arjuna Gita Hangover

Holy cowboy! It’s dueling funny yoga videos! First Star Wars Yoga, and now these buckaroos have come to rule the roost. It’s Cowboy Yoga! Let Connie and his pardner teach you how to get your ass-in-a correct position. It’s a little slow going, but these western yoga wranglers know to take their time to git-er-done. (sorry)

We reckon this could start a craze. Next thing you know we’ll be seeing yoga lasso and spurs™ on sale wherever you buy props! Eh, or not.

Fun fact: This is a short film by Hal Clifford and Lou Bendrick that premiered at the Berkshire International Film Festival in 2009.

Thanks to YogaDawg for the howl.

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Earlier…Star Wars Yoga – Now Watch the Video!

How did we not get invited to this class?

Via Techland

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Earlier…

• Yoda Goes Yogi: Introducing Star Wars Yoga
• Hipster Yoga: A How-To Guide, Thank Goodness

But we hadn’t heard anything since! Until we found this message our inbox last night (see below). Sorry to break it to you, there will be NO Yoga at the Great Lawn 2.o this September. Blast! But don’t worry, there are many more mass yoga events to be had and flavorpill is just getting started. Who knows if they couldn’t line up the sponsors and/or book the park for a September re-do (would’ve been perfect for Yoga Month no?), but having the time to reconnoiter the situation, team fp saw a huge opportunity. (YAMA yoga talent should be excited too). Not only will there be Y@GL next summer, there will be a whole series of mass-produced yoga events across the country. Excited?

We’re not sure if these events will once again be sponsor-laden and piss people off, but at least they took our advice and decided to incorporate some charities. (YD poll results show that most people would just as soon pay for an event if they knew it was benefiting a good cause).

Don’t get us wrong, we like the idea of yoga events for the people, but don’t think just because we’re in adho mukha it means we can’t be watch dogs.

Here’s the full message:

Greetings,

Having staged the world’s largest ever registered yoga class, we’ve decided to build off this amazing event and to bring Flavorpill Yoga at the Great Lawn back to NYC next summer.

Rain cut Y@GL short and although we had originally pushed to do a follow-up in September, the real opportunity is not just to do it again quickly, but to offer this event to a wider community, to involve our favorite charities, and to create a year-long program with events in multiple cites.

With that in mind, we are preparing to bring a more expansive version of the Flavorpill Yoga Series to the Great Lawn in 2011, and have started working on a national program for large scale yoga events across the country.

Additionally, we’re excited to announce the launch of our health and wellness mailer, which will be delivered to inboxes weekly, beginning in September. This publication will expand our focus to health and wellness and will keep you updated on the Flavorpill Yoga Series developments, both in NYC and across the country.

See you next year and Namaste, Team Flavorpill

Here’s that poll again…

Earlier…

• Cowboys Stadium Hosts Largest Yoga Event in TX, Fight Against Breast Cancer
• Flavorpill Officially Responds: Yoga at the Great Lawn Do-Over in September!
• Yoga at the Great Lawn: Rain Couldn’t Stop World’s Record For Largest, Shortest, Yoga Class (awesome photos!)
• Pop Quiz Yoga Students: What is YAMA? If You Said Talent Agency…

And so we’re excited to present to you the latest in YD Giveaways: Win yourself a copy of Neal Pollack’s Stretch: The Unlikely Making of a Yoga Dude. We’re giving away two! Follow Neal’s own comical story of finding yoga, and his journey from a “doughy, 35-ish white man with a goatee and thinning hair” to an utter, self-proclaimed yoga dork. He’s a published satirist, Yoga Journal contributor, and unabashed man of self-deprecation and sarcasm, so really none of the usual yoga characters are safe, if you know what we mean.

“If Eat, Pray, Love had been written by a sweaty, aging, male smartass, then that book might be called Stretch, and Elizabeth Gilbert would be named Neal Pollack.” John Hodgman ~nealpollack.com

WIN: Stretch: The Unlikely Making of a Yoga Dude by Neal Pollack (published August 10, 2010). We’re giving away 2 copies! Thanks to the publisher for providing.

HOW TO ENTER: It’s simple really. Surely there are a multitude of reasons why we’re all yogadorks. Tell us about why you, right now, in your present existence can be seen by outside eyes as a downright down dogged dork. OR if you’re in the dude category, feel free to share that as well. We LOVE to hear from the guys.

Two winners will be chosen at random and announced next week. Good luck!!

Stay tuned for the special YD interview with STRETCH author Neal Pollack coming soon…

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Earlier…

• Ask ‘Stretch’ Author Neal Pollack Your YogaDorkiest Questions!
• YogaDork Giveaway! Win a Copy of ‘The Subtle Body: The Story of Yoga’ in America by Stefanie Syman